Mar 10 2009
How to Help: Supporting an Infertile Couple
Most couples are very surprised when they discover that they may be infertile. This can be an emotional blow to a family. The couple dealing with infertility can really be in for a roller coaster ride of draining emotional experiences. Seeing someone you love go through something so complicated can be hard for family and friends as well. You may feel very sad and helpless when talking with the couple. You may feel like you should offer advice.
Keep in mind that you are not an infertility specialist and you have no way of knowing what infertility treatment may be best for the ones you love. Be careful about finding a lot of information online and offering it up as a solution to all of their problems. Many couples experiencing infertility are very deeply affected by their problem and may react irrationally to suggestions from family and friends. Dealing with infertility is a very personal journey that couples must go through together.
Remember that the couple is probably having trouble dealing with their infertility. Men and women react differently to infertility and some may consider their partner’s reaction to be the wrong one. This can really cause the couple to be in an uphill battle with each other. You offering up solutions is not going to solve all of their problems. You may only be giving them more to deal with. This can severely impact relationships, so you should proceed carefully when offering support and advice.
Do not get discouraged, there are ways that you can offer support without causing more harm than good. You can still be a pillar for the couple to lean on. You can be supportive without intruding on personal matters. Let the couple come to you with information rather than constantly prying for the scoop. Let them know that you are here if they need you, but you understand that this can be a very personal matter. Be there when they want to talk. Don’t discount their fears because they can be very real. Being afraid and talking about it to a third party can be very therapeutic for a couple. Offer perspective whenever possible, but don’t pretend to completely understand, as every situation is different.
One thing to remember is that the couple you care about is feeling very much out of control in a lot of ways. You can offer constructive support by giving them control whenever possible. Asking how you can help and putting them in control of dictating your role can help them feel supported without giving them the impression that they need to be saved. If they would like for you to stay out of it, then stay out of it. Let them know that you respect that decision and that you will be there for them if they need you. Support the decisions that they make as far as treatments are concerned. Wish them well, but try not to speculate on whether certain treatments will work. Offer as much support as needed without going overboard and you will be a great asset to the struggling couple.
Patients of Dr. Eric Daiter have often offered kind words about the way that he handles their very personal infertility situations. If you are searching for a specialist to deal with the infertility treatment of the ones you love, you may want to take personal testimonials like the one below into consideration.
Let me share some examples of the kind of attention Dr. Eric Daiter’s patients receive. While his main office is in Edison NJ, he maintains a satellite office in Ocean Township NJ. The Ocean Township office is closer to my home. However, given the nature of his practice, timing is everything. Ovulation did not always occur when he had office hours in Ocean Township. Dr. Eric Daiter, therefore, arranged to see me in his Ocean Township office, outside his normal hours, to accommodate my schedule or that of my husband. He did this on several occasions.
I have had the occasion to call Dr. Eric Daiter’s office with questions and concerns. His office staff has always been kind and courteous. Surely, this is a positive reflection on their employer. Further, if he was not available to take my call immediately, he never failed to promptly return calls, even on Saturdays. Additionally, he always spent as much time as necessary explaining things and answering questions. Neither my husband nor I ever had the impression that he was in a hurry or a rush to move on to the next patient.
By: Infertility Specialist
About the Author:
Keep in mind that you are not an infertility specialist and you have no way of knowing what infertility treatment may be best for the ones you love. Be careful about finding a lot of information online and offering it up as a solution to all of their problems. Many couples experiencing infertility are very deeply affected by their problem and may react irrationally to suggestions from family and friends. Dealing with infertility is a very personal journey that couples must go through together.
Remember that the couple is probably having trouble dealing with their infertility. Men and women react differently to infertility and some may consider their partner’s reaction to be the wrong one. This can really cause the couple to be in an uphill battle with each other. You offering up solutions is not going to solve all of their problems. You may only be giving them more to deal with. This can severely impact relationships, so you should proceed carefully when offering support and advice.
Do not get discouraged, there are ways that you can offer support without causing more harm than good. You can still be a pillar for the couple to lean on. You can be supportive without intruding on personal matters. Let the couple come to you with information rather than constantly prying for the scoop. Let them know that you are here if they need you, but you understand that this can be a very personal matter. Be there when they want to talk. Don’t discount their fears because they can be very real. Being afraid and talking about it to a third party can be very therapeutic for a couple. Offer perspective whenever possible, but don’t pretend to completely understand, as every situation is different.
One thing to remember is that the couple you care about is feeling very much out of control in a lot of ways. You can offer constructive support by giving them control whenever possible. Asking how you can help and putting them in control of dictating your role can help them feel supported without giving them the impression that they need to be saved. If they would like for you to stay out of it, then stay out of it. Let them know that you respect that decision and that you will be there for them if they need you. Support the decisions that they make as far as treatments are concerned. Wish them well, but try not to speculate on whether certain treatments will work. Offer as much support as needed without going overboard and you will be a great asset to the struggling couple.
Patients of Dr. Eric Daiter have often offered kind words about the way that he handles their very personal infertility situations. If you are searching for a specialist to deal with the infertility treatment of the ones you love, you may want to take personal testimonials like the one below into consideration.
Let me share some examples of the kind of attention Dr. Eric Daiter’s patients receive. While his main office is in Edison NJ, he maintains a satellite office in Ocean Township NJ. The Ocean Township office is closer to my home. However, given the nature of his practice, timing is everything. Ovulation did not always occur when he had office hours in Ocean Township. Dr. Eric Daiter, therefore, arranged to see me in his Ocean Township office, outside his normal hours, to accommodate my schedule or that of my husband. He did this on several occasions.
I have had the occasion to call Dr. Eric Daiter’s office with questions and concerns. His office staff has always been kind and courteous. Surely, this is a positive reflection on their employer. Further, if he was not available to take my call immediately, he never failed to promptly return calls, even on Saturdays. Additionally, he always spent as much time as necessary explaining things and answering questions. Neither my husband nor I ever had the impression that he was in a hurry or a rush to move on to the next patient.
By: Infertility Specialist
About the Author:
About the Author: Dr. Eric Daiter, the medical director of The NJ Center for Fertility and Reproductive Medicine, LLC, a leading NEW JERSEY INFERTILITY CENTER that offers a complete range of MALE INFERTILITY AND FEMALE INFERTILITY TREATMENT. For more information on The NJ Center for Fertility and Reproductive Medicine and Dr. Eric Daiter please visit www.drericdaitermd.com.
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